I woke up this morning and looked up the word apathy. Apathy and depression get used interchangeably but they are not the same. You can feel apathetic and not be depressed. Disappointments and struggles in life can leave you feeling numb.
I have come to say that it is alright to have these feelings. I’ve come to tell you that it’s okay not to know what to do anymore or how to save yourself. As a human, we don’t know everything. We cannot do everything. When we push and push and press and press and try to do everything simply to keep up appearances, we are 1. being fake and simply trying to impress people around us, and 2. we are taking over God’s job.
I remember this song I use to sing when I was on my high school choir: ” Stand still and know that He is God.” Breaking it down it goes:
Stand still and know that he is God. /Know that He will never leave your side. /He’ll fight your battles IF YOU LET HIM, He’ll be your REFUGE, He’ll be your COMFORT./ So You should Let go, Let God Have His way.
I thought about Job, who fell on hard times, losing everything including his health and his children. Instead of him trying to figure things out and PUSH and impress his friends, he went to God. He went to God with his raw and honest feelings. He knew God was sovereign……this sovereignty of God that ….God is truly Mighty, a King, the creator and in control over everything. He didn’t try to cure himself, find a new job, adopt more children, He simply went to the one who created everything. He ran to God for an explanation, He didn’t try to coerce God with His prayers. He didn’t try to bribe God with his worship. He simply sought God with the very issue on his heart. He was real, He was open and He was humble.
It’s not your burden to carry! It’s not your battle to fight! Bad things happen in life, it’s not your fault! Let it go and let it be! Cry out to God and let Him hear the pain and concerns in your heart. Your friends and family may not understand what you’re going through and they might not even love you in the way that you need, but this is the defining moment. The time where you learn to go to God only. He might send His hands and feet along the way, but keep them in their rightful place: as His hands and feet.
God will never dismiss your feelings. God will never make it seem as if you have to work harder, push harder and bust your brains over an issue. He will never ask you to do more than you can handle. If He calls you to it, He will strengthen you.
In the end, Job was restored and it was better than how he started. But no where did it say that Job had to manufacture his blessings. God simply gave them to him in due season.