Tag Archives: Courage

My Father Is A King And He Dwells In The Heavenlies

Lady in Purple outfit

Proverbs 31:22 (NLT) She makes her own bedspreads. She dresses in fine linen and purple gowns.

One day, I was having an intimate conversation with God and I began to speak in poetry –

My father is a King and he dwells in the heavenly courts. It was the beginning of a powerful prayer, a prayer of identity.

God also told me to read Proverbs 31 during another time in prayer. I was like, “excuse me but, what does this have to do with what I’m going through?” I read it anyway.

Proverbs 31:22 (NLT) She makes her own bedspreads, she dresses in fine linen and purple gowns.

 

Photo by rawpixel on Unsplash

Photo by rawpixel on Unsplash

This, Proverbs 31, woman knows her worth. She is frugal, a business woman, intelligent, wise and hard working. She isn’t lazy and she isn’t cowardly. She also obeys the Lord.

A lot of times people make this about a wife – and rightfully so, as she is a proverbs 31 wife BUT I believe all people : male and female can learn from her.

You see, when we know who we are in Christ, we start living like it. We start acting like people that know Christ. It’s not enough to say the sinners prayer, say you’re a christian, go to church etc. We must walk with God like Enoch, Moses , Daniel and Joseph did.

Photo by Jonny Caspari on Unsplash

Photo by Jonny Caspari on Unsplash

A Princess doesn’t hang around filth – which in our case would be sin. A Princess seeks the best and she is backed up by her father – the King. He has her back, she can run to daddy and he helps her. He protects and provides for her. This doesn’t mean trouble won’t come and it also doesn’t mean she isn’t required to rise up in her identity, but it means she has power and knowledge backing her up. She knows the God of the world protects her spirit.

She has complete confidence in God – not her abilities. Human beings are of great worth to God. We are precious to him. Christ gave up so much – coming to earth as a human and experiencing  life, death and betrayal. He was the perfect demonstration of God’s love – meeting us in our limitations but because He is holy – he is the perfect demonstration of a Godly life.

He is God because he didn’t stay dead and he didn’t continue to live on earth but once alive, he went back to heaven.

We have hope – because we all must die. But the hope is that we too get to spend the next life (after death) with Christ forever.

So, our time on earth, must be spent walking in that identity God has given us. We are children of a great King and everything he does is good. We must trust that our father loves us. We must trust him.

Like Daniel’s friends who trusted God – even knowing that God is not required to save them. But they love him no matter what.

Photo by antonio ochoa on Unsplash

Photo by antonio ochoa on Unsplash

If God doesn’t give us what we prayed for, will we continue to walk with him? Will we continue to talk to him and trust him?

Flee from sin. A godly life is your comfort and protection. Royalty does not mess with filth. Don’t let your wicked heart taint your life.

Purple is the color of royalty simply because purple dye was rare and costly. Only the rich could afford it. I’m quite sure most of us are not rich, but I truly believe that we can be rich/wealthy with whatever we have. We don’t need to walk around looking destitute, depressed and defeated.

Humility is a deposition. Humility involves gratitude. I truly believe God wants us to be creative and imaginative.

Remember your worth – God loves you. Don’t mess with sin – run from it and trust God. He is your father and he dwells in the heavenly courts. He has all knowledge and all power! He has ultimate control. Trust Him with your future and your soul and you will always be at peace.

God Bless,

 

 

Teacher – I Have A Question!

Photo by Marcos Luiz Photograph on Unsplash

Photo by Marcos Luiz Photograph on Unsplash

I’m stumped! I have no advice to give you, maybe some words of encouragement but here is just a glimpse of a mind full of questions.

What do you do when a situation makes absolutely no sense. It makes sense based on patterns, human nature and folly, wickedness, sin, and just simply life. But, I hear all the time Christian leaders tell us to have expectation, to speak to our situation etc.

If God is sovereign, if his ways are higher than ours, if his wisdom is meant to confuse the wisest of men, what are we to expect? What about those that are martyred for the faith? Those that lose everything? What about people that die despite trusting God?

I remember, last year, I was sick and I told God that I loved him. I washed my face, fixed my hair and got dressed. I set out to live my best life , sick and poor.

I am simply going to make that same confession: God, I love you. You healed me last year and even though things are not exactly how I want them, I am going to fix my hair, wash my face and get dressed. I am going to serve you afraid. I will serve you confused. I will serve you as I am, where I am and with what I have.

I have no answers. I cannot put the puzzle pieces together. I don’t even know what the puzzle looks like. I have no clue what God is doing but all I do know is that I love him. He has done more than enough for me. He is my strength, even now.

All I can expect in this life are two things: Human suffering and that Christ died and rose for me. Because of what He did, I have eternal life. That is the only guarantee in life. I could lose my life, all my material possessions, friends and family but the only thing that remains is my faith and the hope of salvation.

How God chooses to help me, if he even helps me – is his business. I won’t complain or tell him what to do.

The greatest peace I had was waking up and going on with life with the goal of living! I will not just survive, I will strive. I will utilize all that I am and all that I have.

I am thankful. He gave me everything I needed to face the unknown storm heading my way.

It’s like reaching new levels in a game. After winning each level you gain new skills, higher XP and learn better strategies to overcome. Each level makes you stronger.

Daniel 3:16-28(NKJV)

16 Shadrach, Meshach, and Abed-Nego answered and said to the king, “O Nebuchadnezzar, we have no need to answer you in this matter. 17 If that is the case, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and He will deliver us from your hand, O king. 18 But if not, let it be known to you, O king, that we do not serve your gods, nor will we worship the gold image which you have set up.”

Read the rest from the link above…

To those that lost everything or might lose everything, to those that are suffering in different ways, and those that were taught to speak to their situations and to believe in the false doctrine of the Law of Attraction, hear me:

Trusting in God does not mean bad things won’t happen. Trusting in God doesn’t mean you can speak to a situation and change it. God decides in the end when and how things will end. You must reach a place where you are willing to lose everything for Christ. To accept that persecution and troubles are part of life and especially the Christian life. We are not promised riches, fame or anything these false prophets have shoved down our throats.

Photo by Joshua Hanks on Unsplash

Photo by Joshua Hanks on Unsplash

Our goal is sanctification – pruning and refinement. To become virtuous – humble, meek, gentle and kind. To have great faith and to walk in holiness. These things will never fade away.

God has the power to save us from all trouble but we must learn and be willing to learn. It isn’t always about our comfort. God is not a genie. But He did say he is our friend, our comforter and guide. We don’t know what kind of life God has planned for us, but all I know is that whatever it is, it is ultimately for our good and the good of those around us.

Keep the faith,

 

Goody Goody Two-Shoes

jez-timms-126970

Photo by Jez Timms on Unsplash

Okay.

So, the last few weeks went by slowly AND quickly. A lot was done, tears shed, confusion, and pain. There was also happiness, forgiveness and newness.

Something stood out to me though, as I gazed into the mirror of introspection: that the quest for complete perfection and high expectations is not worth the pain.

It is a crippling mindset that robs you from joy and experiencing life on a day by day basis. It can even rob you of your blessing – that might not always come as you want it to look like. You want your blessing to be perfect, a blessing that makes complete sense to you and acceptable to everyone around you. A blessing that makes you feel comfortable and safe.

But what if your blessing was dressed up as something completely different. Something you never expected? What if it was to show you just how much you are loved and cherished despite feeling as if it is unattainable? What if that blessing was something you never thought you could accomplish but, despite it being beyond your capabilities, God breathed life into it and made it reality? What if you can finally enjoy life without worrying about everything, all the time?

What if you can worship God without fear? To run to God and cling to him even when you fall short? Holding onto Him for dear life and trusting that He will keep you, guide you, fix you and heal you?

Because if you turn away, what else will you live for? Love requires bravery. It forces you to open up and take a risk to give and receive something that has the potential to:

  1. Hurt you
  2. Confuse you

God doesn’t always answer my prayers the way I want him to and that left me feeling really upset and confused. I threw a fit asking God why me and why now and why this? I wanted to hide from God because I thought He failed me.

I wonder if this is how the Jews of Jesus’ time felt, waiting for the messiah to come and save them from earthly oppression. However, they had their own interpretation of scripture and God had his own divine will. We can try as much as we want to control the events of our lives and personally interpret God’s plan for our lives but God’s Will prevails.

If Esther was a modern day Christian, other believers and even her well meaning Pastor would tell her : “Sweet Esther, don’t marry the King, because gurl, he ain’t saved.” Not knowing that sweet Esther was called to be queen so that she could prevent a Jewish genocide. She needed to marry the King to access his status and to demonstrate the power of God in a very meek and humble way.

Nothing in life is cookie cutter, one-size fits all and I’m sick of trying to be the “Good Little Christian Girl”. It’s something all Christians face at one point in their journey.

Jesus died so we can be free. This freedom has become cliche. Free from what? Yes, free from sin. But what God truly wants is not a religious set of puppets that crosses every “I” and dots every “T”, knows all the church lingo and scripture, can debate, lay hands on the sick, cast out demons and speak in tongues.

God wants those with a heart for Him. A heart turned to Him. Hearts that will cry out to Him in every circumstance: good and bad. A heart that acknowledges Him, like David. David cried out to God in good times and bad. David was by no means perfect but he remained true to Himself.

Jesus saved us from the system of religion, the bondage of perfectionism, the opinions of humans, and gave us freedom to worship, love, and to be at peace with one another.

I am tired, aren’t you? I’m tired of all the pressure, internally and externally, to be more than what I am today. I can only do what I can do today but my hope is that as I continue on this journey with God, that I will grow closer to him.

My goal is no longer to simply be a Christian, but to be a daughter of God: to sit at his feet like Mary and listen.

Why the title?

Well, I was stumped. I didn’t know what to call this post so I whispered a little prayer and instantly felt to name it goody two-shoes.

Laughs

Bold right? Imagine that. Well guess what? GOOD! Honesty is the beginning of deliverance. Never be ashamed of what God can deliver you from.

I had to google search the term because it’s been years since I last heard it. A goody two- shoes in simple terms is a people-pleaser and God cannot use or connect with one.

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Jealousy: That Toxic Infection of The Heart.

Jealousy is a sneaky but dangerous infection of the heart. It is rooted in insecurity. I was going to write about people who struggle with jealousy and insecurity but I want to focus on those that are on the receiving end.

Being the recipient of jealous actions is toxic and slowly, but surely, it has the power to destroy you. It has the power to make you feel small, to doubt yourself. It backs you up in a corner. It makes you question yourself on many occasions, wondering if something is wrong with you.

I want to tell you a secret. Well, it’s not really a secret but let me remind you that who you are is not defined by anyone else. Continue to shine, live, laugh and have fun! Continue to strive and grow and chase after everything you wanted in life.

Some of these jealous people will smile in your face, give you gifts and even pretend they are kind. But you can tell, deep down, that something isn’t right. PUT YOUR FOOT DOWN. Do not allow anyone to reduce you or bully you into submission. Stand your ground and say enough is enough. You don’t have to be rude about it but speak your truth!

People will try to dismiss you. They will say, “she doesn’t know what she’s talking about” or,” She’s sensitive”, or ” who cares and ignore it”. And while I do believe that ignoring petty foolishness is the key to success and happiness in life, there are some things that will require you to address it in a mature way. When people know the lines and boundaries they cannot cross, it let’s them know that their jealous tendencies cannot infect you. Your boundaries are like immunity. It is a wall of protection from behaviors and comments that are meant to keep you in a position that will feed their infection.

They will hate you, talk bad about you ( I always say if its not to my face then it’s none of my business) and show disdain at your success and accomplishments but leave them in God’s hands.

God said vengeance is His job. God doesn’t like jealousy, pride and bullying (oppression) and God has a way of either convicting someone’s heart or silencing them all together.

 

 

 

I Am Free At Last!

Everyday is a new day to praise the LORD.  It is a new day to talk to him and learn something new about him and about yourself. A new day to fellowship and connect with others. A new day to help someone rise out of their slump and encourage someone to keep striving. It is a new day to marvel at the power and love of God. It is a new day to hope and trust in the LORD.

Every time the sun rises, it is like a clean slate from yesterday. The troubles from yesterday mean nothing and we celebrate the newness of every new day. No accumulation of junk and burden.  This is the rest Christ has given us in his forgivenss. 

Because I am a Child of God I have rest.Peace follows me wherever I go. I am prepared for resistence, but I am neither afraid or angry. I am prepared to lose alot of things but I am not insecure. I am prepared for criticism but I am not ashamed of Christ.

There are many things I do not know or understand but I will not pretend that I have it all together. I am simply allowing God to take me where he is leading me and along the way I’m giving him the honor for it.

I have depended on my own strength for so long. It’s peaceful to rest in the strong arms of Papa God.

I am finally free to flow with the Holy Spirit. What a joy is that to me!

To finally break out of my shell, the rigid structure and routine of religion and law, and moving into the free and flowing power of the Holy Spirit.

 

Testimony of Deliverance

I decided as an act of obedience, to the Word of God, to share my recent testimony with everyone I know.

Pretty much I was troubled in my sleep for many many years. As time went on it, progressed to not being able to completely rest without guilt. I had to always prove I wasn’t lazy because a family member had negative things to say about everything I did. I grew up wanting to be strong and I tried my best being better than them. I wanted to be loving and kind , strong and wise. I felt as if I had raised myself. I didnt realize the amount of stress I was under trying to defy the words spoken over me and my future . I’ve had so many negative things spoken over me as a child and rarely anything positive without any insult added.

The LORD carried me through a series of steps. I was allowed to hide away and live in my own world where I was happy and free but it only took me so far. Last year, God placed me in a church where I could no longer hide and fade into the shadows. Almost every service God was speaking to me and exposing and removing the junk from my life. I struggled in my own strength for many years. My motto would be “I’m tired”. I knew if this continued I would die. The LORD said rest. I fought that too. Finally, on Saturday, I read scriptures instead of self help articles pertaining to sleep and rest. I was also watching youtube sermons about faith. I confessed what I read and heard. That rest is my right in christ. I have the right to rest and rest peacefully. I spoke to verbal curses from my past spoken over me, that they may be broken in Jesus name. That very night, as I slept, I was harrassed by an spirit that tried to choke me. I woke up and called out the name of Jesus but I couldnt go back to sleep after. I asked the Lord for energy to make it through service.

Again, I was put on the spot and I was very angry. I was so angry that I couldn’t speak. I was asked to say something in faith but instead of just doing it, I felt embarrassed and wanted to hide. It wasnt even logical because in my head, I had no idea why I was scared. I just wanted to be left alone. I didn’t want anyone to notice me. I just wanted to enjoy the service and go on my way. Basically I wanted to be invisible. But my church family prayed for me when I couldnt pray for myself. That same feeling of suffocation returned and I knew if I didnt pray I’d die. It was so hard to speak but I finally said “I will serve the Lord with all my mind, heart and soul.

I know I can do anything in Christ. I dont have to hide anymore or be ashamed of my struggles. My struggles are here to give God glory because he has rescued me time and time again. I don’t have to prove to myself that I’m not worthless or that I have to work harder than anyone else to be loved by God. The Lord has called me to speak, therefore I will speak. Not for my own gain but because of the Kingdom of Heaven and the work he has prepared for me to do.

May the LORD Jesus Christ be praised now and forever.

Happy Indepenence Day

Today was a pretty busy day for me. While most people were out celebrating Independence day, I went out to buy groceries. I spent a couple minutes writing out a list only to realize I had forgotten it once I was almost halfway there. I decided to whisper a prayer and hope my memory wouldn’t fail me. I had a $20 budget and needed the food to last me for atleast a few days.

I bought almost everything I needed but for the things I couldn’t get,  I had to come up with a few substitutions.

I wanted cabbage salad with dressing but couldn’t get the dressing so I opt to mixing the red cabbage into the rice.  I mixed brown rice with jasmine rice for extra nutrition and portioned it out for 4 servings. I spent time researching what a serving was for cooked and uncooked. I added tumeric for added nutrition and a bit of onion for flavor. I followed this pattern for the rest of my meals: tuna spread, baked lemon chicken, turkey patties, whole wheat and white pasta blend, and my new favorite: beet and squash pasta sauce. Because I’m back to working out regularly, I’m learning to enjoy protien from non meat sources like tuna, eggs and peanut butter.

When I eat protien, fiber and carbs with every meal it curbs my cravings. Low carb diets don’t work for me because I need the energy.  I’m learning to appreciate food and the wonderful variety available.  Food is not to be feared or hated. Food isn’t the reason we are overweight or underweight. Food won’t make us ugly or beautiful. Food won’t increase or decrease our self worth. We are in control over what goes into  our mouths. Food does not define who we are. Food is for energy. Food is medicine. Food is norishment. It is not a source of comfort and should not take God’s place. I decided to take control and do my research. Learn about nutrition and how food is used as energy so I can be and feel my best throughout the day. My life is not centered around fear. I don’t fear a low budget or if something will make me gain weight. A piece of bread will not make you gain weight! It took me this long to get it but I’m glad that God has opened my eyes to my poor relationship with food!

So this Independence Day I thank the LORD for the emancipation of my mind. I’m no longer a slave to lack or fear.

I love you Jesus

Continue to do your work in my life. Nothing is in vain. My struggles, the lessons learned, the pain,this blog. And through it all You are showing me exactly who you are and how great you are!

Thank you for calling me your daughter! Thank you for loving me! I will cling to you!  The proof of my salvation is the love and protection you shower over me. Knowing that the devil can only do so much before papa God comes to the rescue!

To those reading this, I pray that God will renew your faith, give you joy which is your strength so that you too may continue to press forward! Life is hard but God is BIGGER THAN IT ALL!

Trust in him and he will work on your behalf! Jesus loves you!