Tag Archives: Future

You’re Almost There

Photo by Jeremy Bishop on Unsplash

Photo by Jeremy Bishop on Unsplash

Don’t give up, you’re almost there.

These are the words that ring through my head on a cold Sunday night.

Faced with opposition and the coming of a storm, the natural reaction is to either run in fear or shut down. It’s natural to want to give up or go another direction.

God revealed to me a very vague blue print of my current season. It was in that blue print that I found direction, comfort and peace. I had many opposition and trials but I stood firm on the foundation of God’s word.

However, the incident before me is greater than any I could imagine. Sort of like a tsunami that I  can see from the distance. It’s right over my head and there is no escape. The normal reaction is to either run or shut down but my spirit woman is saying to grab something flat and learn how to surf. I have no swimming experience. I’m out of shape and agility and balance is out of the question. I can’t consult YouTube , google or even another person. I just have to pick up the board and ride the waves. I have to be observant, deliberate and then just hop on. I have to study the waves, maybe I’ll be washed out, maybe I’ll drown . But there is another likelihood that i’ll find my footing and find myself the queen of the waves.

You are almost there.

Whatever you are doing – if God told you to do it, don’t let it go. Don’t give it up, even if you find yourself losing resources, support etc., just keep going! Don’t lose sight of the vision and trust that God will get you there. If He said it, He will do it. God is faithful to perform his word!

Have faith!

Hebrews 11: 1:

Faith shows the reality of what we hope for ; it is the evidence of things we cannot see. NLT.

The fundamental fact of existence is that this trust in God, this faith, is the firm foundation’under everything that makes life worth living. It’s our handle on what we can’t see. The act of faith is what distinguished our ancestors, set them above the crowd. MSG V 1-2

Now faith is the assurance (title deed, confirmation) of things hoped for (divinely guaranteed), and the evidence of things not seen [the conviction of their reality – faith comprehends as fact what cannot be experienced by the physical senses]. AMP

God requires our faith to serve and honor him. He gives us a dream or a destination and it will take all of his children great faith to get there. No Christian life is marked by comfort. All true Christians will have to leave their comfort zones and give up everything for Christ.

Have faith and believe in his word! Don’t allow anything in life stop you!

 

The Body Is The Temple Of The HOLY SPIRIT.

This will be the first out of two posts about my weight. The reason  I am limiting the amount of posts is because it can easily become a whining session full of bitterness, confusion and defeat. However, I just wanted to share something I’ve learned

It is common knowledge that the body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. If you believe in Jesus Christ you basically have God living inside of you. As a christian our walk with God is not just spiritual but physical and mental too. We need God to help change our attitudes. The way we see ourselves and others. The way we see him needs to change as well. There is always constant growth, or should be. A part of this process comes from throwing down idols. We throw down idols through confession. Specific confession followed by removing said idol. For example: food and body image or your past of being bullied because of your weight. I had a wake up call. God is showing me that I am sensitive in this area. I keep lying to myself thinking I’m strong and nothing affects me but it does. Words hurt. Being mistreated for wanting good things in your life is confusing. So in subconscious ways I sell myself short for comfort. I deep down don’t want to be hated. I don’t like the sly comments or the harsh words. But at the same time selling myself short is affecting my relationship with God. I  am not treating myself correctly. I am not allowing God to be honored by how I treat myself. We are all worthy of love. Not because of what we have done or have to contribute but because we all are created in the image of God. When we lose our identity we become ineffective. We cannot do the will of God because we won’t have the confidence to seek him for it. We also open ourselves up to sin because of a lack of self disciple and boundaries. Its a form of self hate. A reflection of how we see ourselves. And how can we truly love our neighbor if we don’t love ourselves. We must first seek God with all we are and patiently wait as he molds us and removes all the baggage.

This is my current place. And at this point in Time I’m feeling the need to introspect. Not with my own eyes but through God’s eyes. He knows where to look and how to perceive. He knows exactly how to fix and enhance. He knows how to eraticate and heal.

No more dishonoring and abusing this temple of the Holy Spirit.

One Day At a Time Little One

Mathew 7: 21-23
True Disciples
“Not everyone who calls out to me, ‘Lord! Lord!’ will enter the Kingdom of Heaven. Only those who actually do the will of my Father in heaven will enter. On judgment day many will say to me, ‘Lord! Lord! We prophesied in your name and cast out demons in your name and performed many miracles in your name.’ But I will reply, ‘I never knew you. Get away from me, you who break God’s laws.’
I keep having reoccurring themed dreams about my university. I truly feel at this point in time, my heart is opening up to the idea of using the rest of my life, energy and talents for investing in the Kingdom of God.
However, there are many times where I feel confused about which talent I should invest in, which direction to go and how to even get started. There are days the confusion weighs heavy on my heart and there are days I feel I can’t do anything.
 I do know the urgency of walking in the will of God but I have no understanding of timing.
 What does this have to do with the scripture you ask? Well, I truly feel that doubt, fear and anxiety are not of God and reflects a lack of trust in him. I have to keep telling myself that he will show me everything at the right time, all I have to do is let him fix me, mold me and purge me into the woman I am to be.
 However, while investing too much into fixing the world and using my so called God given talents and gifts, I don’t ever want to lose my way. I don’t ever want to get so caught up that I forget to keep the law of God. I love the law of God. I love it because I know it’s for my benefit and those around me. I also know it brings joy to God because he is the pure essence of love and holiness. So, instead of focusing on something that is in many ways out of my control , at this time, I will use my energy to seek the face of God. Search for understanding: of him and my role in his master plan of salvation for the world. Because this is HIS SHOW, not mine. All I can do is walk with him in purity.
Mattthew 6:33-34
Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need.“So don’t worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will bring its own worries. Today’s trouble is enough for today.
 Sources: https://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Matthew+6%3A33&version=ESV
Youversion.com

 

Suck It Up and Get It Done.

Self- Pity, complaining, procrastination are all things that can take away our joy. One part of growing up is learning how to do things we don’t like doing. For instance, today I did not want to exercise and thought of every possible excuse to give. I then realized that If I didn’t do it, I would be selling myself short. In the end,  I can happily say that I’ve completed it and feel a lot better than before.

There is joy to be found when we maintain discipline and focus in our lives. I’m learning that if I want anything to happen in the future, I have to start now. If I want a good outcome, I have to put in the effort now. If I want to find peace and joy in life, I have to stop complaining, stop worrying over things I can’t control and start focusing on things that I can do to increase my talents and skills.

In my walk with God, I cannot sit and become lazy and expect growth.

Joy also comes from doing good things. Whatever they may be, do them without complaining. It might feel uncomfortable now but the rewards are worth the effort.

Silence In The Darkness.

For the last few weeks my life has been topsy turvy, emotional and crazy. I don’t know where front and end or up and down, meet. I feel tossed around. I can’t hone in and truly feel my emotions. I feel disloyal to myself sometimes. But there is something in me that is telling me to hold my ground. Do not give in to the pressure and retaliation of what’s going on.

Being silent in terms of not standing up for myself is hard. I’m so use to expressing how I feel that I forget that I need to stop. I feel as if God is asking me to let him fight my battles. I feel as if he is asking me to trust him and love him and to forget my feelings and my cares when it comes to other people for a while.

It’s hard. I hate feeling this way. I hate being tossed to the side by people I care about. I hate it. I hate being lied to. I hate being taken for granted.

I don’t know how I am going to do this but I am asking for God to give me the strength and the knowledge of how to be silent. I need to be invisible right now.

I know there is something I am not seeing. I can’t see it. What is happening to my already messed up world? I didn’t think it was possible to lose anymore than I had already lost; but it happened. It happened suddenly and painfully.

Psalms 118:8. I keep saying this over and over again, I don’t care about people or what they do but honestly I do care. I care when I put effort into something and it’s not returned. Sometimes I question if it’s wrong to expect love and care from those you love and care for.

I had a realization that my life is changing and that the ideals and my way of thinking are being changed. I feel as if the walls around my heart and mind and everything I cling to are being broken. I don’t like it. It hurts more than I expected. I do know, though, that there is something to look forward to. That despite everything that is happening, I can put my hope in a new and better me.  Not in a selfish, self preserving way but a me that is God created.

I think the greatest thing I can do right now is to stand still. I want to run away but I will face everything that comes. Facing everything in silence. There is nothing to defend or prove. Nothing to argue over. Nothing to cry about. Nothing to be sad over.

I have no idea what the future holds but I’m going to hold God’s hand. I need him to lead me on this path that is dark, lonely and scary. There is no light. It’s like I’m walking with my eyes closed. How scary is it to do such a thing without a guide.

 

A Dash towards Paradise

Ascending white stairs

Towards heaven’s throne

 

Or what seemed like it

 

but not without a fight

dear sister & brother

My brave little soldiers

With innocence dancing upon their faces

& a fire within their heart

 

Oh & how they lead the way

 

And up and up we go

& thus outside the window pane

That marked a dead of end

Were dancing fairies as white as clouds

In formation they made a castle

That sat upon rocks with ocean waves

That crash & beckon us near

 

Oh how our hearts leaped

 

& we dashed across the blue darken sea

A false hope, an obstructed dream revealed

Never to reach, never to feel, never to hold

& that’s how it all ended.

Merrishel R.